The Breakup That Changed My Life
By C.W. Forge | Built, Not Broken
“The only way forward is through.”
> “Most men don’t change until life rips them open. This was the moment I broke — and chose to rebuild.”
At 31, I thought I had life figured out — a solid job, good paycheck, and a woman I respected. She had a bachelor's degree in Sociology and Early Childhood Education. Smart, grounded, and principled. We had a clean break, no drama. But I still remember one thing she said:
> “The honeymoon phase should never end.”
I called it out as nonsense. “That’s not real life,” I told her. “That kind of thing fades.”
She didn’t flinch. She believed it. I could see it in her eyes, her manurisms, the energy changed in the car. It was over.
We parted ways.
Three months later, her words were still echoing in my head. I didn’t miss the relationship — I missed the version of me that thought he had it all figured out. And that’s when the shift began:
> What if she was right… and I just didn’t have the tools to understand it?
That question cracked something in me.
I started reading everything I could get my hands on — self-help, psychology, sociology, dating and relationships.
That breakup didn’t destroy me. It forged me.
It made me confront everything I didn’t know about connection, responsibility, and how I show up in the world.
The Forge Mentality
Men are rarely taught how to process loss, shame, or truth. We bottle it up, hide behind work, pride, distractions.
I did all of it.
Until I couldn’t anymore.
> You’re not broken — you’re unfinished. But nothing worth while gets forged without fire.
What changed me wasn’t a therapist or some feel-good YouTube guru.
It was the brutal truth that no one was coming to save me — and if I wanted a different life, I had to take full ownership of who I was and who I was becoming.
Diagnosis ≠ Destiny
Somewhere along the way, mental health got tangled up with victimhood.
We started labeling ourselves like it’s identity. We started living in the shadow of the diagnosis. The human mind and body is extremely resilient. Given the right environment it can heal or change itself.
We hear things like “trauma-informed” or “avoid your triggers” and forget that healing doesn’t come from sidestepping the pain — it comes from walking through it and growing stronger.
> A diagnosis might explain where you’ve been — but it doesn’t define where you’re going.
Yes, you’ve got a past. So do I.
But strength is built in the aftermath — not the label.
What This Blog Is About:
This space — Built, Not Broken — is for people who’ve been through the fire and decided to take their power back.
I’m not a therapist. I’m a tradesman who rewired his own brain and understands that he will never be finished. It's a life long adventure that I welcome with open arms.
This is a place for mental toughness, personal growth, and masculinity without apologies.
It’s not soft. It’s not trendy.
But if you’re ready to stop blaming and start building — welcome to the forge.
> The only way forward is through.
You can start by asking yourself:
What stories have you been telling yourself and does it still serve you?
What would happen if you stopped seeing your past as damage and started seeing it as a blueprint for change?
Who are you when the excuses are gone and its just you and your choices?